A thousand dreams are born every
moment, and a thousand more die every moment. These are young dreams, old
dreams, some asking for more, some less, some carefree and some wrought with
concerns.
Dreams of those whose health does not
permit them to soar to the limits of their potential. A young students dream to
study abroad shattered by the knowledge that the old folks will have to bail
out for it. An ambitious girl’s dream to rise up the career ladder reined in by
the ticking clock strongly urging her to have babies before it is too late. A
painter’s dream to make it big; locked in the discarded canvass by
the need to feed his wife and children. Dreams of those numerous children
wanting to know more and see the world; heavily shadowed by the fearful parents
and their restrictions. Dreams of young lovers to stay forever together; broken
by zillion superstitions and societal rules. Dreams of an old couple to get
love and care from their children drowned in the busy, stressed lives of their
sons and daughters.
So many dreams, so many lost. But
still we keep dreaming, and hoping that with us, it would be different. For if
not for these dreams, what do we have to live for?
Have you heard the sound of thunder?
Have you really listened to it? It speaks of power, strength – a controlled
anger unleashed by the sky.
Sometimes it sounds like a yelp of
joy, abundance, a rumble of contentment!! At other times it is a growl of
dissent, a warning, demanding you to be aware of the immense force you seem to
have forgotten about with your everyday cares.
As its vibrations pulses through, you realize
your insignificance in this world. How tiny, powerless and vulnerable you are! And
how wonderfully liberating is that feeling! To remember that you are not as
important as you think, you cannot even drown out the sound of thunder! Or capture
it!
It is at that moment that you truly
begin to relish the sound and the vibrations. And wait for it come again. Alas!
It is too elusive in nature, with its own whims. Having reminded you of
your reality, it flies away to scare some other ignorant soul. Each
time,leaving behind a string of those, waiting eagerly for more!
I wish I was a tree. I would be so
sturdy, solid and in peace with myself and my surroundings.
I would have been in the same place my
entire life and not be bothered about the fact that I cannot go and see the
world.
I would have loved the wind, bend
along with it but never leave my roots. I would dance with it, rustle my leaves
and sway my branches gracefully without inhibition.
If I was a tree, I wouldn’t try to
avoid the sun, afraid to tan or sweat. I would welcome the sunlight and bask in
it.
I would have loved the rain every time
it visits me, without worrying about mud and slosh. I would get drenched every
time it rains with no worry of illness or care. I would have become more
beautiful with each shower!
If I was a tree I would have been the
home to many smaller creatures. I would provide food and shade to others. I
would be doing this without expecting anything in return, without being proud
or being intimidated by others.
I would have been neither happy not
sad, I would have no ambition and neither could have been chided by others for
the lack of it. I would not have any pressure to perform or conform. I would be
free in the truest sense without moving an inch.
I would have just accepted the
universe as it is, with humility and wisdom. I would not have felt the need to
know or create a purpose for my life to make myself feel important. I already
would know my contribution to this world and that would have been enough for
me.
I would have not require anything
except the sun, the rain, the birds and the wind, all of which are abundant
around me. Hence I would not need to plan for the future or worry about any
dearth.
I would have been without thought,
desire, emotions and religion. I wouldn’t have needed a God to have faith or
needed to know the mysteries of the universe.
I wish I was a tree so that I would
have know what it is to just be.
“"I went to the woods
because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of
life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to
die, discover that I had not lived. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the
marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that
was not life”
-Henry David Thoreau
Nothing
had moved me more than this phrase from the movie ‘Dead Poets Society’. It
sounded as if Thoreau was pleading us to live deep, live deliberate and live
rich. To achieve great things (things which are not materialistic). To be
excellent. To be really there.
Maybe
that’s why Thoreau went to live in the woods. To understand what existence is
really all about, live without its current array of distractions, to learn to
live in the moment.
What
does it even mean? Live deliberately.
Maybe
it means not just going sloppily through life but actually being aware of
living
Maybe
it means knowing each moment, each action, each feeling and sensation
Maybe
it means just being in that moment – not in the past, not in the future, not
somewhere else, but here
Maybe
it means totally concentrating in doing what you are doing, thinking what you
are thinking and feeling what you are feeling
Maybe
it means living life to the fullest, without fears, worries and cares.
I
do not know much about these things. But I do know that most of us are not
living deliberately. We just get by each moments, days and years. No wonder
time seems to fly away. Why is it that there are so many stories, incidents and
memories from our childhood time and so few from our adult years? A friend once
told me that’s because while we grow up, lesser number of novel and interesting
experiences happen to us. We have already seen so much. Since we are doing so
many things, very little catches our attention for long enough to register as
something to be remembered.
So
while a child could be very excited about flying a kite or going to the zoo, we
find these activities quite regular – something we wouldn’t really bother doing
till we get a payoff for it.
I
seem to have wandered off from what I wanted to speak about. Let me try to get
back to where I started. Take a typical day. When I drive to work, am I really
only driving or also thinking about the impending meeting? In the meeting am I
completely listening and contributing or actually thinking about that scratch
on my car received while driving to work or thinking about the interview I have
to give in the afternoon? While preparing for the interview – am I truly
concentrating on it or wondering about how much I need the promotion, will the
promotion come through at all and what will happen if it doesn’t? During the
interview am I just answering the questions or thinking about the panelist –
what impressions they have about me, etc.
Most
of the time, I am in the past or the future. We spend too much of our time and
effort either listening or battling that voice in our head which persists on
living in the past or the future, but rarely in the present. Despite the fact
that this is the only moment we actually have - as said by Master Ugway in the
movie ‘ Kung fu Panda’.
Very
rarely are you doing only what you are doing – but during those rare moments
your work would have turned out to be excellent. It is true. I am sure,
everyone remembers those particular moments, when we have been so deeply
engrossed in some activity, that we never noticed time flying by, couldn’t get
distracted by anything and come back to reality only when the activity is completed
to find that we have done a phenomenal job of it. I believe most athletes and
sportsmen achieve these moments when they have done their best.
I
am reminded of this film ‘ Peaceful Warrior’, where a mentor helps a gymnast
learn that by being in that moment only, being that moment, brings out the best
in you.
This
is something which would take a lot of practice, but I believe this is the path
to excellence and living life to the fullest.
